Getting Back On Track

       On the morning of January 1st I walked into the bathroom, took off my pajamas, and stepped on the scale.

251.2 pounds

I was in shock, but at the same time there was no actual reason for me to be the least bit surprised at seeing the number glaring back at me from the scale's face. I knew I had terrible eating habits. I knew that exercise wasn't a word that could even come close to describing any of my daily activities. I spent every day living out the same routine: wake up, eat breakfast (3 eggs, two slices of toast slathered in butter, and a cup of coffee with so much cream and sugar you could barely tell it was even coffee), go to work, sit at my desk for 4 and a half hours where I would inevitably need some kind of snack, go on my lunch break (usually a ham sandwich with cheese and mayo, way too many chips on the side), watch videos on my phone until it was time to go back to work, another afternoon snack of some kind,  home for dinner, and finally to finish it all off dessert during an evening of TV time.

       This was every day, with very little deviation. If you asked me why I lived like this I would tell you I didn't go outside because the heat gets to me really badly, or I'm too picky to eat anything really healthy, maybe that my asthma would get in the way of trying to be active. I made excuses for my unhealthy lifestyle constantly... but then I saw that number. 251.2 was unimaginable. I just couldn't believe I had let things get this bad. It was time to stop making excuses and make a real change.

       So, on January 2nd I re-downloaded the MyFitnessPal app for the first time in about 5 years and began to log every single thing that I ate or drank. I used a food scale at every meal. I bought a Fitbit and started forcing myself to go on walks throughout the day. I struggled so much at first. I tried mentally comparing the portion sizes for my food to what I used to eat and I was disgusted with myself, but I couldn't focus on what I used to do. I had to focus on what I needed to do from here on out.

       Now you may remember those excuses I mentioned before, in particular the one about the picky eating. I hate vegetables. I like very few fruits. I hate nuts and most carbs that are not white rice or potatoes. I'm sure you can imagine the difficulty I faced trying to balance the need for a healthy diet with an extremely limited palate. I've been working to slowly introduce some more diverse options into my meals, and while not always successful it has led to the addition of a few new favorites. For one, I have discovered that onions are beyond amazing. I used to meticulously pick through any meals that contained them until I had uncovered and removed every single piece, and now almost every single dinner I make contains onions. It may be a tiny victory but it's still progress.

       Horseradish, Cheddar, and Caramelized Onion Stuffed Burgers are such an easy and flavorful dinner after a crazy day at work. Ellie Krieger and her amazing healthy recipes have made this journey so much easier for me. The balance between healthiness and flavor is so perfect. The most important part of this whole journey so far has been trying to find that balance. I know as soon as I begin to feel deprived is when I will fail, so measuring everything and keeping proper portion sizes in mind is of the utmost importance. Craving something a little decadent but don't want to worry too much about your calories? Try Lemon Garlic Marinated Lamb Chops with a mix of mashed potatoes, celery root, and parsnips on the side for one of the most delicious meals you'll ever have... and still come in at under 500 calories for the whole meal.

     

       This lovely little chart is my journey so far. There have been many ups and downs and I still have a very long way to go (58.2 lbs to be precise), but I'm proud of how far I've come and the changes I've been able to make. 

251.2lbs January 2017

220lbs March 2017

165lbs, January through May 2012

       At my lowest weight I was 165lbs. This was in the first half of 2012. I was active, happy, and (in relative terms) healthy. I had the energy to do the activities I loved and I felt confident in my own skin. I hate that I let myself stray so far but I can get there again. I know that not only can I reach my lowest weight but I can surpass it as well. I'm starting with a goal of 160lbs by October of this year. I have lost 33 out of 91.2 pounds in 3 months so as of this moment I am right on track. It's hard and it's only going to get harder, but I can't wait to share with you guys when I get there.