I am lazy, let's just get that out of the way right now.
Whew. I feel better. Now that you know that one little fact, everything I'm about to say will make sense.
It's almost that time...time to go back to school. Most parents feel at least a little excited about this. Not me. I'm not excited. And as awful as this sounds, it's not because I am just so depressed to be away from my kids all day. I'm actually sort of thankful that they will have something productive to do. Due to the fact that I'm lazy, we don't do much around here during the summer. Ya know those really cool moms who takes their kids to the pool and the park and the beach and the movies? I love those moms. I love to wave at them from my window while I sit on my couch with a big bowl of ice cream.
But I digress.
Missing my kids is not why I dread "back to school" time. The real reason? I'm lazy.
Back to school means an end to my laziness. Okay, it actually just means that my laziness has to be hidden under the blanket of back to school nights, soccer practices, art shows, school plays and class parties. I have to, ya know, put on legit clothes...including a bra. I have to shower and brush my teeth and...well, okay, the shower doesn't always happen. Two words people, dry shampoo.
Back to school means I have to be at least a little organized. Did you know that at school, they don't just throw the kids a box of Eggos at lunchtime and say "good luck"? Overachieving weirdos. Because of this, I have to pack lunches. Fun fact, Eggo waffles don't taste so great when they've been in a lunchbox for four hours...I've heard.
But my laziness has bigger problems than packing lunches and putting on pants. And that bigger problem has a name. Homework. I despised doing homework when I was in school. Having kids in school is like a second installment in a horror movie: Revenge of the Homework. This time, it's out for blood. It's like a nightmare where I'm being chased by a psychopath wielding a sheet of long division. On a positive note, I can save myself the trouble of applying to go on "Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader", I already know the answer.
So, for me, back to school means schedules, organization, pants and homework. Thank goodness ice cream is sold year round.
Is it summer yet?
Ha ha ha, I hated having to get dressed and leave the house every day! Esp since when we moved here it got to -47! I seriously considered homeschooling at that moment.
ReplyDeleteAll I have to say is; I'm so glad my daughter will be riding the bus to and from school this year. I'll just sip my coffee in my pajamas and watch her all bundled up climbing onto the bus from my window. :)